Stress is something that I have been dealing with excessively for a few years now. It greatly affects my life whenever it strikes. Dealing with a lot of stress on a regular basis started before I graduated from high school and me transitioning into college. I’m definitely not trying to live in the past. I’m just trying to give you all a taste of what has happened throughout my life and how it affects me today. I was trying to get things done on time. Plus, my health was spiraling out of control due to the added stress I was under. Mind you, finding out I was still seizing didn’t make it any better. Epilepsy was the main cause of my stress.
At that time, I found myself bouncing between different emotions. I was anxious, sad, annoyed. All of a sudden, next thing you know, I am having a breakdown. I was a very vulnerable person. Dealing with a whole lot of tasks doesn’t work well for my mental health or dealing with an overwhelming situation or traumatic event. There is an emotional consequence to it. I stay to myself when this happens. I don’t want to be around anyone. I want to be in my own space and figure out how to handle it. Everyone is faced with stress at some point in their lives and they deal with it in their own ways. Don’t get me wrong though. Stress is good too. It motivates you to do your best with anything that you set your mind to.
I am currently going through a dilemma. It has me on edge. The one activity that helps me to release stress and tension is writing. I have a journal in which I write down my innermost feelings and thoughts about those situations that get to me. I found out that it definitely helps me. It also helps to have that one person that is your confidant and that gives you great advice. That person is my older sister, Dani. I love her so much. She is always there for me.
I wasn’t clinically diagnosed with acute stress disorder, chronic stress disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, or any medical condition related to these. The feelings that I have are real. Some people don’t understand what goes on in my mind and thus, dismiss them. “Oh, get over it. It’s not that serious.” That’s not being sympathetic to me. I don’t want to communicate with you if you have that type of attitude. Goodbye. *Snaps* I was researching about stress disorders online and a few of those symptoms relate to me. I rather not diagnose myself, even though I know my stress levels get so high to the point where it affects me physically and cognitively. I did the same thing when I was researching about partial seizures and seeing if I was still seizing. My suspicions were true that time because of my medical history with seizures. I want a professional to do that. This year, I am trying my very BEST to calm my nerves and continue writing my thoughts down. It is working but it still takes its toll on me.
I just want to let you guys know that everything will be okay. If you suspect that you have a stress disorder, talk to a medical professional just to see what the cause may be and how you can treat it. If left untreated, it can lead to serious health problems. I’m here if you need anyone to talk to. Keep on being the positive and inspirational people that you are.
Be proud. Be fearless. Be strong.